A Warning

Sometimes I don’t know why I bother. I try to give you the most obvious of signs and yet you fools blatantly continue to ignore them.

In a gallant effort to warn you of what is to come, should you continue your procreation with those who I have deemed unworthy, I showed myself to you through an ultrasound of a testicle tumour.

G. G. Roberts and N. J. Touma from Ontario's Queen's University discovered my image while scanning the inflamed testicles of a 45-year-old patient. They described my expression as that of a man faced with great pain.

Idiots, you sound so shocked, how often have I told you of the anguish I face in trying to create my master race. Again and again I have warned you that my wrath will not forever be appeased and again and again you fail to take note. Of course my expression is of pain, you worthless fools have done nothing to please me.




"An expression of great pain"

 

As if your ignorance was not insult enough, you took it one step further by suggesting that this could be a gesture from the Egyptian god of male virility Min.

How dare you confuse me with my nemesis of the predynastic times! If you had seen the battles we used to have over his feeding the Egyptians the aphrodisiac long-leaf lettuce, you would not make this mistake so easily. How I loathed that smirk of his as he watched their minds turn to lustful mush as the long-leaf lettuce secreted its milky substance. I spent a great number of centenaries trying to undo the damage that so called ‘God’ had done.




Even Min's large phallus couldn't save him from my wrath

 But enough reminiscing, the prophet who I chose to bring this message to you has had the testicle removed and survives, what cannot be removed is the message that I send to you.

Stop with your fetishes. Stop with your stupidity. Acknowledge me as your one true God, for the time of reckoning draws near.